I have been disappointed in the past and deep down I don't want to be hurt again, I just want to be loved. I will put my spiritual life first. If a man isn't direct with me I usually get turned off simply because I am a mature person with kids. I am beyond the silly, giggly don't know what to do or say phase. I don't even know what's love anymore
Dear blogger:
I understand your point completely and I agree with you. But I do want to say that love is suppose to be fun. Its suppose to allow you to be yourself, and flirty and have fun with your best friend. You can't allow yourself to be so serious to the point that you don't have any fun.
I am with you when you say you want a straight forward guy or else you get turned off. I agree, that turns on any girl.
But, what if I told you that while dating, my husband put aside his seriousness to talk to me and get to know me. But, after we got married, he acted as if he already conquered what he wanted and he went back to being so serious all the time. And to me, that's a turn off because it was like he was cold towards me. All because of his seriousness.
I didn't like that. It turned me off. But I loved him so I helped him by always talking to him and pointing out every time he would be cold towards me. Or when he would act so serious to the point that it didn't feel like we were in a relationship. It felt like we just worked together. We had lots of problems in our marriage until I realized that love is suppose to be fun. Its suppose to make you feel those butterflies in your stomach. Its suppose to allow you to be giggly and YES, even act a bit silly sometimes. Your partner is suppose to be your best friend (after God of course). After a while of helping my husband with what I called 'his flaw' he now is a whole lot better. He's still working on it, because that's just his personality. And yes, sometimes I still have to point out to him a thing here or there. But I will give him credit because he changed! Soon I won't need to point it out anymore. He'll get it on his own. Love takes work, but its an investment that pays off.
Again, I do agree with you. I think men need to Man up and Speak up. But some men could use a little help at it. However, If you find yourself having to always take the lead, then Run away from that, because we women need a MAN, not a boy.
